Episode 67: Transponder™!

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Intro and outro music by Bolt Thrower

L: "Oh, shit!" - R: "Holy, shit!"

 WTF WERE WE TALKING ABOUT?
- Rules for the limerick contest
- Robert Millar column about doping
- Buy The Cycling Anthology volume 2
- Klaus' posts on Manual For Speed 
- G+D Store (SMC jersey coming soon)

Episode 67 Limerick Finalists:

There is a sly hamster from Petsmart
Whose Giro team blew up the chart
Now he’s chosen Pinot
To win like Hinault
And let the French winnings re-start!
                         - Mr Beechcroft the Hamster (not ellegible)


There once was a race in France
Where the contestants all wore funny pants
They showed off their junk
And smelled of a  funk
But the podium girls never looked askance.
                         - Bob, Florida


It's a race that tours all around France
I've won just as many as Lance,
They don't ride on choppers ,
Wiggo's a clopper,
And Andy Schleck hasn't a chance
                         - Rob, Cornwall UK


This year Kittel's on the podium
Last year he bore the peloton's odium
They all said with a grunt
"No more turns on the front!"
Cos they knew WADA had just banned Imodium.
                         - Adam, Granada Spain


The Krusher, and Mike, and Klaus
Mr. Beechcroft is in the house
He's watching the Tour
with his Dad on the floor
He's a rodent, but not a mouse.
                         - Justin, Pennsylvania




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Krushing the Giro: The Final Krush

This image pretty much sums up this year's Giro. Nibali, awesome stage finishes, horrible weather.

I know this post is about 3 days too late, but for what it's worth, here's my final thoughts on an excellent and very exciting 2013 Giro d'Italia.


The Good

Vincenzo Nibali
"Of course!" you are thinking right now, "He won the race!" Well, yeah, but the way he won it was pure, 100% class. Nibali has emerged, not only as a real Italian contender for Grand Tours (unlike Basso, Scarponi, Di Luca, Cunego, etc), but he has shown that he can attack, that he can lead a team, and that when he's in good form no one can beat him. He won the Pink Jersey and he got a truckload of confidence for himself, his team and for the Italian tifiosi.

Italy
Not only did Italy host of the best Grand Tours in recent history, but an Italian won it. To top it off there were seven Italian stage winners (only four last year), four Italians in the top ten and and Italian KOM. Besides that, Italians should be very happy with the future of the sport. A lot of talented young riders showed themselves during the three weeks; Francesco Bongiorno, Fabio Felline, Diego Rosa, Fabio Aru, and Stefano Pirazzi, just name a few. Add to that Gianluca Brambilla, Diego Ulissi, and Damiano Caruso and you have a whole lot of young talent coming our way.

I wonder if the RAI graphics dudes had to order more Italian and Colombian flags 'cuz they ran out half way through

Colombia
I don't want to come off as a super-patriot (again), or bore you with the details of how amazing this Giro has been for Colombia. I'll just say that I saw more Colombian flags on the RAI graphics this Giro than I had in the last five Grand Tours combined. In the end, there were two Colombians in the GC top 10, two in the Points, four in the KOM, and three in the Young Riders classification. There was one stage win, plenty of seconds and thirds. I'm more than satisfied.

The Wild Card Teams
I mentioned them in a post a few days back. Team Colombia, Bardiani Valvole, Vini Fantini and Androni Giocattoli all played key roles throughout the race. Bardiani and Vini Fantini shined especially bright with stage wins by Enrico Battaglin and Mauro Santambrogio.

Mark Cavendish and Omega Pharma-Quick Step
No one can argue that Mark Cavendish is the best sprinter in the world. Five stages in a Grand Tour is an amazing feat. Now, add to that the fact that, before the Giro started no one thought that OPQS were up to the challenge of getting Cav to the finish line. Well, they came through. Great team effort.

Sky
The team had to reinvent itself after Sir Wigg-a-lot left the race, but they did just that and they turned out to be a very strong team, even winning the Team Classification.

Movistar
Four stage wins and Beñat Intxausti a solid eighth in the final GC. I doubt they were expecting anything like this, but I'm sure Unzue is a happy, happy camper.

Carlos "Bananito*" Betancur
I know I had a whole dilly about the Colombians up there, but Betancur's Giro was so amazing, he deserves to be called out. Wow, this kid has balls... and legs. I said it before, this kid is Colombia's best chance for a rainbow jersey.
__________
* Thanks to Natalia for bringing up to my attention that Betancur prefers the nick name "La Ronca."



The Bad

FDJ
Wait, were they even in the race? I thought I saw Nacer Bouhanni there for like two minutes and then he was gone. Weird.

Ryder Hesjedal
Ryder started the Giro with style by attacking the first chance he got, but ran out of gas quickly and the defending champ left me wanting more. At least Ramūnas Navardauskas saved the Giro for Garmin-Sharp. He celebrated twice, but only won once.

Sir Wigg-a-Lot
After all the talk and all he did was nothing. At least Hesjedal tried, dude.

The Weather
Of course I love racing in bad weather, but when it's so bad, that they have to re-route stages and even cancel them? Screw that.

Declan Quigley's Attempt at Pronouncing Names
Where was Robert Hatch, dammit!?



The Ugly

Danilo Di Luca
Seriously, dude? Go fuck yourself.

The Plastic Barbie Throne
WTF was that? Seriously, Italy, WTF was that??

Giro Ken sits on his Barbie Throne

Fabio Baldato
As ugly as ever.

Turns out Fabio Baldato has a doppelganger, too: Actor Tom Savini

Baseball Hate Galore
Horrible. Tasteless. Lame.

Everyone in this picture (and their suppliers) should be ashamed of themselves

Krushing the Giro: Stage 16

Beñat Intxausti dedicated today's to the memories of Xavi Tondo and his grandfather

Today's stage reminded me of an old school Welterweight fight. It was scrappy, messy and unpredictable with lots of attacking and sudden bursts of speed. Of note Pirazzi's apparent complete lack of restraint. And thank God for that. I absolutely love tough, head-strong, stubborn riders like that. Reminds me of Ludo Dierckxsens in the Classics of the 90s. A guy who'd look dead one minute and would be out the front the next, just to get dropped again, only to attack again 10 kilometers after. That type of passion is what attracted me to cycling in the 80s and I'm glad it's still out there.

At the end, only one acceleration mattered, and that was Beñat Intxausti's. The Basque outsmarted Kangert and Niemiec to take his first stage in a Grand Tour and climb one step in the GC to ninth, leaping over a struggling Pozzovivo.

The big loser today was Santambrogio. As I write this, I still don't know if he lost time because he had an off day or because he had some sort of a mechanical. Either way, he fell down to sixth in the general classification.

Santambrogio and his doppelgänger, wrestler Matt Stricker

Uran, who did a good job of following wheels today, was a guest on RAI's post stage show along with teammate Dario Cataldo. Alessandra de Stefano took the opportunity to make fun of Rigo's awesome mane, which looked especially amazing exploding out of his Rapha winter cap. When asked how the mood in the team had changed since Sir Wigg-a-lot's departure Uran said that the first thing that changed was the language of conversation within the team. I'm sure Hey-now was happy, since I've heard his English is terrible. Cataldo added that the team is much more relaxed and that riding for Uran is easier, since he doesn't require Sky making tempo the way Wiggins did. Besides, he pointed out, Uran is a bit of a jokester in the bus. I don't see Wiggo cracking any jokes on the way to the start line.

Uran, his hair and Cataldo laugh it up during RAI's post stage show

Speaking of cycling caps, Cavendish was wearing one before the stage, when blowing out the candles on his birthday cake. Happy birthday, Mark, and thank you for not wearing a baseball hat. Now, if we can just get you to do the same after stage wins...

Happy birthday, Mark

Finally, my dear brother and podcast co-host, The Almighty Klaus is landing in Italy later today. He will be there for the rest of the Giro working on a few assignments. I wish him the best of luck and hopefully he can send me some images I can use in the blog.


Randomness:

- Mario Cipollini mention counter: 5
- Helmet talk counter: 16
- Euskaltel guys on the deck counter: 3
- Stage winner wearing
     Cycling cap: 1 (Uran)
     Baseball hat: 11
     No hat: 1
     Visor: 1

Krushing the Giro: Stage 14

Tomorrow's stage will finish at the Marco Pantani memorial that marks the spot where he attacked in the '98 Tour

I delayed today's post in hopes that we'd get some sort of official word on tomorrow's stage. Well, RCS has now announced that tomorrow's stage will in fact take place and that it will climb the Col du Mont Cenis, but that it will not go all the way to the summit of the Col du Galibier. Instead the stage will finish at the Marco Pantani memorial about 4 kilometers from the original finish line. There were rumors that the stage might be scrapped altogether, so this is better than nothing.


It's really too bad that we had such limited live pictures of today's stage. Sounds like the last 5k were pretty exciting. Henao attacked at some point as did Pellizotti, and Rosa, but all attacks were neutralized by Nibali. The Italian, along with Santambrogio and Betancur, dropped Evans and Uran. Santambrogio took the stage and the bonus seconds, while Nibali took second. He continues to show great form and at this point it's hard to bet against him. The battle for the other two podium positions, however is still very much alive. Santambrogio had a great day, and is now a real contender. Uran, Evans, Santambrogio: Three riders, two places on either side of Nibali.

Absolute shit weather didn't stop Betancur from finishing an impressive third

Yesterday I had predicted that Carlos Betancur would win the stage, and I wasn't far off. He continues to have an amazing Giro. The Colombian came in third and moved to 9th in the GC. He is now only three seconds behind Majka in the race for the Maglia Bianca. The potentially bad news for him, and Pozzovivo, is that AG2R may be pulling out of the Dauphine because of all this doping nonsense. The Dauphine was race that Betancur was targeting.

Oh, something else... Vini Fantini has all their guys wearing visors. People: NOT BASEBALL, NOT TENNIS, NOT GOLF! IT'S CYCLING!

Phew... Anyway, I'm relieved that we will have a stage tomorrow, now I just hope we'll get some sort of live pictures of it.

Randomness:

- Mario Cipollini mention counter: 5
- Helmet talk counter: 13
- Euskaltel guys on the deck counter: 3
- Stage winner wearing cycling cap / baseball hat / no hat counter:  1 / 10 / 1 - Santambrogio had a visor! WTF?

Krushing the Giro: Stage 10

Uran proudly wearing the Colombian flag and a cycling cap

Wow. I don't know where to start. Another great day for Colombian cycling. Uran and Betancur had amazing performances. Team Colombia and the other Colombians didn't do too well, but I'll happily take the one-two.

Final results of stage 10. The Colombian tricolor way up there, twice

Sky took over the pace-setting pretty early in the stage on the climb to the Passo Cason di Lanza. Was that a good idea? I guess depends on who you ask. Henao and Wiggo were in trouble, but Uran went on to win the stage. Is Uran the leader for Sky? Well, he told RAI (in excellent Italian, to my surprise) that Wiggins and Henao are still strong and that now Sky will have two leaders. He added that he recuperated better during the rest day than Wiggins. I don't know, the Englishman did not look good to me, but we will have to wait and see. I would not be the SkullKrusher if I didn't point out, once again, that if Uran wouldn't have been asked to wait for Wiggins on Friday, he'd be 2nd in the GC 26" behind Nibali.

AG2R are also having a great Giro. Pozzovivo and Betancur played the one-two punch perfectly up the last climb. That's two second places for Betancur in this Giro and he continues to crawl his way up the Maglia Bianca classification. AG2R has to be very happy with their two new signings. Maybe Mike Spriggs has the right idea with buying their jersey and putting it in the freezer for future enjoyment.

Mike's real refrigerator with a real AG2R jersey in it

On the other side of the spectrum, Hesjedal lost contact with 54k to go and finished over 20 minutes down. Needless to say his Giro is over. What a shame. He looked very racey at the beginning of the race last week.

How many times have I said "keep an eye on Evans"? This is the last time I say it, because everyone now realizes I was right all along.

Finally, a special and heartfelt THANK YOU to Rapha for remembering that the Giro is a cycling race and not a baseball game. Rapha (yes, I'm kissing their ass) provides Team Sky with cycling caps and it was very nice to see Uran not only wearing a cycling cap on the podium, but a winter cycling cap. Thank you Rapha!

Uran answering question in Italian wearing a proper Rapha cycling cap

Randomness:

- Mario Cipollini mention counter: 3
- Helmet talk counter: 10
- Euskaltel guys on the deck counter: 3
- Stage winner wearing cycling cap / baseball hat / no hat counter: 1 / 8 / 1 (Finally!)